The Marines Are Alway First In And Last Out.

For those liberals out there surfing the blogosphere I wanted to go over a few items that the hosts of the 2008 Summer Olympics has put on the agenda to ease your worried minds about visiting there in August. That's right China our communist friends across the pacific are gearing up to be your prison guard host for August.

1. The Chinese Government has shut down non essential factories to reduce CO2 emissions ( Don't worry the lead based paint factories are still up and running)




2. China will bar politically minded entertainers ( These would be entertainers who think Communism is a bad thing, Barbara Streisand still gets a red carpet)




3. All Migrant workers, beggars and fortune tellers have been forced to leave the city (however political dignitaries will be allowed in ... go figure)




4. DVD Stores have pulled all there pirated stock of movies (No chance of bringing home a copy of the Dark Knight)




5. 1.5 Million people (Roughly the size of Phoenix) have been evicted so that Olympic buildings and parks could be built.




6. Extra road blocks (to catch terrorist and guys selling t-shirts with "Free Tibet" on them)




7. Athletes are not being allowed to leave the Olympic Village before they compete.




8. 130,000 soldiers and "volunteers" cleared beaches of an unexpected algae bloom( Can you say too much dead fish)




9. Government officials have implemented a NO AFRICAN policy for bars and restaurants(Wheres AL Shaprten?)




10. Missile Launchers at the main entry points to the Olympic areas .(Watch out for Jet Wash)




11. All Banners and leaflets with with religious, political, military, human-rights or environmental themes have been BANNED




12. Television Media has been restricted to only scheduled approved events.




13. All Know "Dissidents" have been detained ( Be Careful Code Pink Girls)




14. And Finally all Dog Meat has been banned from the Restaurant menus.

Follow the links,if you dare, all of this reporting is coming from Western news agencies. Apparently they can't get enough of the crack down, they seem to suck up the communism with a straw like it were the last drops of a soda and all you hear is that loud slurping noise. Just remeber that if you watch the Olympics this summer it has a theme "One World One Dream" and its brought to you by the Peoples Republic of (Communist) China. Maybe it should be "One World One Red Dream". I just got goose bumps so I should better stop. If no one hears from me it's because I have been taken to a secret location by Black Ops Olympic Officials and made to eat Magic Chicken then run over with a tank, made to build a 5 story brick wall across the dessert, and then have to play with toys painted with lead based paint. Isn't communism great?