Thursday, May 14, 2009
If your the father of a daughter or daughters you will understand what I am about to share. If not you will probably roll your eyes and tell me I'm over reacting. Being a Father has it's rights of passage just as being a boy did, just as those wild college years, or any other time in anyone's life. From the birth of your first daughter until she is able to send her first email or send a text message is a pretty peaceful time filled with things such as Disney Princesses and art supplies in the least expected places.
After the leap from little girl to young women your in trouble as a father. Suddenly you notice that your little girl now thinks a certain boy may be funny instead of gross or yucky. Next you may experience what I like to call "time to go look at tools while the girls go shopping at Targe't" phase. After that you can probably expect one day for the phone to ring or answer the door bell and hear the un-mistaken cracking voice of a young man "Hello Mr.Smeag is your daughter home?". At this moment in time (which has not happened yet but I am preparing for mentally) you will probably think of a few diversionary answers such as:
Always safe~~~"...Why no Johnny Smeagette is at her Grandma Smeags house..."
Daring~~~" I'm sorry Bobby she is out bungee jumping ...would you like to go I'll rig your harness...:)"
Science Fiction~~~" Billy you just missed her she just got beamed up to the Enterprise she's out of reach."
Menacing~~~" Danny she's at the store with her mother and I was just cleaning my guns ...would you like to help?"
Diversionary~~~" I'm sorry Mikey she's on the phone with that rich kid Bobby"
Any of these and many other useful responses to "The First Boy" contact may hold off additional contact for maybe one or two grades depending on which one you use and whether it's in person or over the phone. If they persist you can always hire the kid at school who has repeated 6th grade so many times he's now old enough to vote to take care of things. Live Long And Prosper.