"Breaking Dawn" Is Coming And It Can't Be Stopped  

Monday, July 28, 2008

***UpDATE: phill.com article


Only four days left until the next book in Stephanie Meyer's thrilling "Twilight" series is released and we can't do anything to stop it. So We here at Listen to Precious are providing a public service announcement to all who will inevitably read "Breaking Dawn". Please adhere to the following precautions before reading:

  • Find a good soft comfortable reading position ( A Park Bench or Stone Outcropping could cause serious bruising).
  • Good Lighting is essential ( I suggest a head lamp as this will probably not wake up your spouse as you stay up late reading).
  • Hydration ( I suggest 2 bottles of water to every 44 oz of Dr Pepper ).
  • Have a roll of Duct Tape Handy( If another in your household has already read it before you and you don't want any spoilers like " I can't believe Bella bites...".
  • Call in sick to work ( Don't worry your boss is reading it too).
  • For wives with Husbands who wont be reading it buy him Monster Truck Rally tickets.
  • For Husbands with wives who wont be reading it... no wait that wont happen never mind.
  • DO NOT IGNORE CHILDREN( Leave plenty of cold cereal and Disney movies with in reach)
  • If you are going to be reading outside make sure to wear sunscreen (You could end up with tan line shape like the book on you face)
  • Bathroom breaks(For the guys) it's OK to take your book with just remember to SIT DOWN.
  • And Finally when you get to the end stop.

*This has been a public service announcement from listentoprecious.blogspot.com your source for realistic news,information, and sound advice.

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1 comments: to “ "Breaking Dawn" Is Coming And It Can't Be Stopped

  • Stacy
    July 29, 2008 at 6:58 PM  

    Thanks for the tips - I think the duct tape will be especially useful. Thanks for the link you left on my blog too, that is hilarious stuff!

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